fat

i feel sooooooooooo fattttt!!!!!!!!!!!!! okay, saturday was maureen's dinner party at tahoe galbi and stevie ordered at least ten plates ... and then today was the food for naomi's thing. and then tomorrow is food at fucking el dorado park. i wanna be skinny or slender for once! and not thick! i need to start exercising more ... and watch what i eat. like seriously. i was doing so well ... but anyways. both days were pretty fun except for the part where i had to wait in ghetto nation at dockweiler beach for tesia and tillman to come ... for two hours. thanks to the nice latino that lent me his phone to call naomi. and thank god i memorized naomi's numero! but yea then we could NOT find any firepits so we all went to victor's and alex's apartment and finished our hot dogs there. i think i am about to start my rag because i am feeling bitchy about everything and my self esteem is so low right now. and i am usually not like this. fuck. man. i just want school to end at get six a's and one b in only apush. and i still didnt even start on the stupid projects! man. i need to run through the finish line. i want to write about more things but i am not sure what so i'm just gonna ramble on. i love the postal service. like listening to such great heights makes me feel like i am underwater in the ocean with the sun rays hittin through. i think i am going to go through my postal service phase again. i am feeling philosophical right now. like the sun and the planet earth. you know i had a dream that i was flying upside down in the upside down part of earth and i was falling but i flipped right side up because of the gravity. it was super super weird. brand new colony - the postal service.

i think i have ADD no joke. cause i get distracted REALLY easily. and i'm not talking about the computer alone but stuff like the wind moving the tree's leaves or just plain daydreaming. i mea i can focus real well but its just that yea. i need something to keep me on track. and when i went to alex/victor's apartment, it made me realize that i want my own apartment haha. it would be fun to have to do my own dishes and laundry and shit. and being free from so much things. i mean yea there are bills and all but honestly, i think all the fun parts override the bad things ..

i don't wanna write too long that it makes you just give up reading my posts so i am going to go fall asleep and be pissed off that i have to go to el dorado park ... tata

bs <3