so i might be able to go to Nippon for free if i get chosen for this Japanese American Student Program thingy that is going to take 8 students to Japan for 11 days. WHAT A PERFECT OPPORTUNITY!!! so yea, i am definitely going to apply for that. i JUST came back from DCON and i am super pooped.
the dance was so freaking fun. and there were some hella cuties there .. of whom i wished i could've danced with when i had the fureaking chance. fml. but it's all good cause times will come when i will find others. ohoho. but other than that
time has passed by so fast .. honestly. i remember typing about senior year and how stressful it was during those times when i was applying to colleges. time is definitely precious and i don't want to waste any second of it. living it to the fullest is going to be my motto for the next nine weeks until school ends. i can't believe there is only 45 more school days left ... THATS TOO FUCKING CRAZY. NEXT MONTH IS MAY AND THEN JUNE AND THEN GRADUATION!!!!!!!! UGH!! sigh ... college is going to be incredible!! i can't wait for it. speaking of colleges, i am going to visit Berkeley this week with my parents and go check it out. but i doubt that it will encapture my heart because i am truly an Los Angeles girl even though i will move out of LA when i grow up. hopefully to a foreign country of some sort. but yea, i em super uber excited for what the future is holding for me ... prom, marine bio trip, prom, prom, graduation, summer, college, summer, AHHHHH!!!
but imma go and take a nap ... or maybe not but i need to sleep early. i shall finish the spanish 2 hw and sleep ...
sledoot
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Sunday, April 4, 2010
a condom lasts once, but a bruin lasts forever
so i had this dilemma of trying to decide between UCLA and UCB cause i didn't want to stay in LA and the life of living away from home was the whole point of a college experience other than getting a good education and transitioning from an dependent life to an independent life yanno? honestly my heart never belonged to UCB and i wanted an acceptance for bragging rights. but i realized that maybe i should give UCB chances and staying too close to home wouldn't be swell but i realized after my intense 1hr convo with an older friend from UCLA and it made me realize that my heart does belong to UCLA even if its too close to home. and i know i won't be associating myself with ktwn unless if its for food haha. im trippin and i know imma crave homefood and coming home whenever i need a refuge so i think i am going to stay in LA and attend UCLA hehe. but yea, my heart totally belongs with UCLA right now and i doubt that it will be changing anytime soon ... so
BRUINS IT ISSSS
BRUINS IT ISSSS
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Thursday, March 25, 2010
all 5
so i got into all five schools that i applied to ... hehe and i wanted to share my UC personal statement ... and i am actually proud of it so here it is (and yes i know it can be jiral but hey everything needs a little jiralness in it):
I am a “Japorean”, a second generation half Japanese and half Korean girl. Since I am a child of first generation parents, my exposure to the Japanese and Korean culture was very authentic. Not only was I exposed to contrasting foods, I was exposed to different customs. Because my father grew up in Japan, he naturally learned to be accepting of others and reserved. However, my mother learned to be cautious and passionate. Although my parents found strengths in each other, they were too different and eventually ended up clashing a lot. Being Japorean meant that I had to mediate between my parents whenever they clashed with each other. As I dealt with these contradicting personalities, I gained skills that allowed me to get along with all sorts of people. These skills helped me gain friends that came from all over the world. This is where diversity started to play a big role in my life.
As I became used to the different races, I became comfortable in any location, whether it was on the bus, different parts of the city, different parts of the country, just anywhere. I started to love California’s cultural diversity and my understanding of different types of lifestyles grew when I went on a road trip to Alaska. This road trip was a specific program called “Cross Country” and the purpose of this road trip was to teach teenagers independence, communication, and many other things. I was nine when I went on this trip and on this trip I met all different sorts of people that had various lifestyles. I learned street smarts from a girl who ran away from home. I learned boxing from seventeen-year-old boys who lived on their own without their parents’ help. As I learned about these different lifestyles, I started to embrace my fellow campmates for who they were instead of judging them for being different from me. When I came back from the road trip, I was fresh with knowledge about other peoples’ lives. I had learned about all the different kinds of lifestyles and what type of hardships others had. I used this knowledge to become friends with all sorts of people and embraced these people for who they were. This helped me to become friends with an even more diverse group than I had before. Not only were these kids from various ethnic backgrounds, they also had different lifestyles.
I became friends easily with everyone and as I grew older, I started to take an interest in their cultures. My best friends now are Sri Lankan, Brazilian, and an adopted Chinese in an American family. Learning about their strange yet new cultures was fun. Sri Lankan people always came late to a party and when they ate their traditional food, they ate with their hands. Brazilian people are very laid back and always try to look for a way to have a good time. Caucasian American people had a set of rules for the whole family. As I became immersed in all these different cultures, I realized that I was addicted to diversity. I wanted to surround myself with diversity. That’s why I aspire to go to a college that is diverse and academically challenging enough for me. And what is more perfect than a college that is a salad of diverse cultures? Going to a UC school is one of my aspirations because I know that I’ll flourish under an admirable academic education as well as an excellent exposure to many cultures.
Being a Japorean has not only made me love two contrasting cultures, but has opened my heart to other cultures as well. That’s why I wish to be submerged into various cultures at my undergraduate college and I wish to have my nursing class a sea of all sorts of people.
second prompt:
Rolls of laughter can be heard, as my friends watch me flare my nostrils, cross my eyes, and gape my mouth open. This was a daily routine that would be often seen amongst my friends and me. I love to see my friends happy and it’s a natural instinct for me to try to cheer them up whenever they are feeling down. Ever since I was young, being happy and making others happy were things that I loved to be and do.
When I was younger, my brother was often scolded and disciplined because of his actions. Most of the time, these disciplines were severe and would bring my brother to tears. As I would quietly observe my brother, I felt a need to cheer him up. However, I was scared to because he would often push my help away since I was the younger sister. Watching my brother become depressed and slip further into darkness, I realized that couldn’t let this happen to him and I stopped being the bratty sister that I was. I opened up myself and would crack jokes to him. I wasn’t the one that brought my brother back into the light, but I know that I helped him. When my brother came back into light, I knew that my happiness could bring others happiness. After my brother returned to normal, he became the hilarious person that he used to be and I soaked up his antics to help cheer up my friends.
As I became better at cheering up people, I gained a skill that helped me. I became very keen towards what other people were feeling and it became easy for me to tell whether or not my friends were irritated or sad. Whenever I sense unhappiness from my friends, it becomes my mission to cheer them up or to let them know that I am there for them. Cheering up people has always been my thing and it’s a quality that all my friends will tell you about me. It’s a quality that will never disappear for as long as I live.
I am a “Japorean”, a second generation half Japanese and half Korean girl. Since I am a child of first generation parents, my exposure to the Japanese and Korean culture was very authentic. Not only was I exposed to contrasting foods, I was exposed to different customs. Because my father grew up in Japan, he naturally learned to be accepting of others and reserved. However, my mother learned to be cautious and passionate. Although my parents found strengths in each other, they were too different and eventually ended up clashing a lot. Being Japorean meant that I had to mediate between my parents whenever they clashed with each other. As I dealt with these contradicting personalities, I gained skills that allowed me to get along with all sorts of people. These skills helped me gain friends that came from all over the world. This is where diversity started to play a big role in my life.
As I became used to the different races, I became comfortable in any location, whether it was on the bus, different parts of the city, different parts of the country, just anywhere. I started to love California’s cultural diversity and my understanding of different types of lifestyles grew when I went on a road trip to Alaska. This road trip was a specific program called “Cross Country” and the purpose of this road trip was to teach teenagers independence, communication, and many other things. I was nine when I went on this trip and on this trip I met all different sorts of people that had various lifestyles. I learned street smarts from a girl who ran away from home. I learned boxing from seventeen-year-old boys who lived on their own without their parents’ help. As I learned about these different lifestyles, I started to embrace my fellow campmates for who they were instead of judging them for being different from me. When I came back from the road trip, I was fresh with knowledge about other peoples’ lives. I had learned about all the different kinds of lifestyles and what type of hardships others had. I used this knowledge to become friends with all sorts of people and embraced these people for who they were. This helped me to become friends with an even more diverse group than I had before. Not only were these kids from various ethnic backgrounds, they also had different lifestyles.
I became friends easily with everyone and as I grew older, I started to take an interest in their cultures. My best friends now are Sri Lankan, Brazilian, and an adopted Chinese in an American family. Learning about their strange yet new cultures was fun. Sri Lankan people always came late to a party and when they ate their traditional food, they ate with their hands. Brazilian people are very laid back and always try to look for a way to have a good time. Caucasian American people had a set of rules for the whole family. As I became immersed in all these different cultures, I realized that I was addicted to diversity. I wanted to surround myself with diversity. That’s why I aspire to go to a college that is diverse and academically challenging enough for me. And what is more perfect than a college that is a salad of diverse cultures? Going to a UC school is one of my aspirations because I know that I’ll flourish under an admirable academic education as well as an excellent exposure to many cultures.
Being a Japorean has not only made me love two contrasting cultures, but has opened my heart to other cultures as well. That’s why I wish to be submerged into various cultures at my undergraduate college and I wish to have my nursing class a sea of all sorts of people.
second prompt:
Rolls of laughter can be heard, as my friends watch me flare my nostrils, cross my eyes, and gape my mouth open. This was a daily routine that would be often seen amongst my friends and me. I love to see my friends happy and it’s a natural instinct for me to try to cheer them up whenever they are feeling down. Ever since I was young, being happy and making others happy were things that I loved to be and do.
When I was younger, my brother was often scolded and disciplined because of his actions. Most of the time, these disciplines were severe and would bring my brother to tears. As I would quietly observe my brother, I felt a need to cheer him up. However, I was scared to because he would often push my help away since I was the younger sister. Watching my brother become depressed and slip further into darkness, I realized that couldn’t let this happen to him and I stopped being the bratty sister that I was. I opened up myself and would crack jokes to him. I wasn’t the one that brought my brother back into the light, but I know that I helped him. When my brother came back into light, I knew that my happiness could bring others happiness. After my brother returned to normal, he became the hilarious person that he used to be and I soaked up his antics to help cheer up my friends.
As I became better at cheering up people, I gained a skill that helped me. I became very keen towards what other people were feeling and it became easy for me to tell whether or not my friends were irritated or sad. Whenever I sense unhappiness from my friends, it becomes my mission to cheer them up or to let them know that I am there for them. Cheering up people has always been my thing and it’s a quality that all my friends will tell you about me. It’s a quality that will never disappear for as long as I live.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
2lbs / week
so i started this weight loss project of losing two pounds per week until prom ... hehehe. i have nine weeks until prom so that would be around 18 lbs. oooo boy thats a lot of weight to lose. but it sounds easier when i say 2lbs per week right? haha. so yea, that's my goal by the end of the week .. to lose 2 lbs. sigh. so in the effort of trying to lose 2lbs this week i went on a 6.5 mile run today. goodshit. my legs are pretty sore right now. i didn't know i was capable of doing that after a long time of not running properly. tomorrow im going to do a 3 mile run just to take it easy on my poor legs and then on thursday imma do the 6.5 mile run again. hehe. i'm really serious about losing this weight that latched itself on after summer! no bueno. anyways i cant pay attention to this so im going to have to gooooo. gudbai. and gudnaite.
sledoot
sledoot
Thursday, March 18, 2010
YOUR MUSIC WILL LIVE ON FOREVER
REST IN FUCKING PEACE
SEBA JUN.
you made some of the best beautiful pieces ever and your name will never be forgotten.
life is short people i hope you guys realize that. he was only 36 and he died during the 7.3 earthquake in Japan. anything can happen. live life.
SEBA JUN.
you made some of the best beautiful pieces ever and your name will never be forgotten.
life is short people i hope you guys realize that. he was only 36 and he died during the 7.3 earthquake in Japan. anything can happen. live life.
Monday, March 8, 2010
tumblr vs blogspot
i feel like if i make a tumblr i'd be betraying my blogspot. so i think i'll stick with my blogspot for now since i've been with this for a long time.
sigh, i withdrew $340 from my account today. it almost ripped my heart in two. but i figured with my paycheck tomorrow and the two upcoming paychecks, it'll all be replaced. hehe. i finally know what i'm going to do with all the money in my bank account by the end of june. i think i am going to go stay in japan for a couple weeks. with the familia in saitamaa. my padre's hometown. i wanna go to school for ONE semester or something. that would be incredibly fun!! cute japanese boys!! baseballers!!!! zaaaaaaaaaah! but yea, i am going to go to the motherland. i would go to korea but my grandpa is having his 80th birthday this year and alll the relatives are going to come and stay so i might as well go to japan and stay with my relatives hohoho. im eggcited.
SENIOR YEAR IS ALMOST DONE I HTINK WE HAVE LIKE 78 DAYS LEFT OR SOMETHING OF THE SORT. excited i am.
anyways, it's getting late and i need to take a shower and suni needs a bath so i shall write later.
sledoot!
sigh, i withdrew $340 from my account today. it almost ripped my heart in two. but i figured with my paycheck tomorrow and the two upcoming paychecks, it'll all be replaced. hehe. i finally know what i'm going to do with all the money in my bank account by the end of june. i think i am going to go stay in japan for a couple weeks. with the familia in saitamaa. my padre's hometown. i wanna go to school for ONE semester or something. that would be incredibly fun!! cute japanese boys!! baseballers!!!! zaaaaaaaaaah! but yea, i am going to go to the motherland. i would go to korea but my grandpa is having his 80th birthday this year and alll the relatives are going to come and stay so i might as well go to japan and stay with my relatives hohoho. im eggcited.
SENIOR YEAR IS ALMOST DONE I HTINK WE HAVE LIKE 78 DAYS LEFT OR SOMETHING OF THE SORT. excited i am.
anyways, it's getting late and i need to take a shower and suni needs a bath so i shall write later.
sledoot!
Sunday, February 28, 2010
dear God
life is so fucking hard. sometimes i just want to give up. and i feel like i need to get away from Los Angeles and live my own life somewhere else without all this bullshit going on. i love my parents and yet i hate them. i want to get out of this place. i want a peaceful life. i want this i want that. and yet again everythings self centered around me. i think i need patience, i need courage, i need repentment, i need Jesus Christ more than ever. i need another job. i wish i wasn't a female at the moment. i want out. i need air.
Saturday, February 6, 2010
oh dear
if i am ever to get intoxicated, i need someone that will help me have fun ... not leave me aloneeee making me walk around in the middle of the street in the rain!! lol and texting up random ass people! omg. hahahaha. sigh juliechoi i wish you were with me yesterday :(((
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Monday, January 25, 2010
best friends
friends are so valuable. true i like feeling alone sometimes but i love my best friends as well. they're always there when you need a shoulder to lean on or and ear to spill your heart out to. and i found my ipod today so im happy for that as well yayy. well technically **** found my ipod in his room, but it makes me feel a little better for being drunk and not being responsible. but i still think God is telling me to stop doing all those things. anyways, im starting not to like him anymore so thats good cause he wasn't healthy for me and he's not the one for me. but yea... yay! i love my friends!!! all the good ones anyways!!! gnite! my heart feels at peace today.
sledoot
sledoot
Sunday, January 24, 2010
this shit
is not getting any better. i need to get far far away from this place. or find some grounds where i can stand strong. i need some support and self-morals to keep myself away from this shit because God is giving me signs. some crazy signs.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
times
damn i fell again from that spiritual high and i can feel satan just pulling me back and back. and its hard cause i think i know who satan is using to lure me back into his stupid arms. but i wonder if God is just sending me to these places as tests. you know? its crazy. i know that God's in my heart but theres this feeling that i can't seem to shake off. and all that smoking shit, i feel like im falling into some kind of black hole. its what brings me closer to that darkness. it's kind of scary. and i'm really sick of it right now. i wanna take a long ass break and whoever says that shit is healthy. fuck that. that shit gives you coughs, munchies, and all these other unnecessary ailments in life. ugh. idk. but other then thattt, this old old feeling came up again and memories just keep flooding in from the times i spent with that person. ohoho. it makes me giddy and excitedd. it kind of brightened up my whole life. i love crushes hehe. i am going to go now and get ready for laura to pick me uppp.
sledoot.
sledoot.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Sunday, January 10, 2010
my rock
retreat was so freaking bomb. i got blessed again. i feel like i can't get blessed enough in my lifetime. and i was sitting there at the sunday em service, i realized that i do NOT know anything about life about God about Jesus Christ. and that humans are so ignorant in everything they do. it kinda came to me like a tsunami.
----
so today, (1/11/10) i was walking to Borders from work and as i was walking there, there was this lady sitting on these cafe tables outside. i didn't really pay attention to her but i felt some kind of staring from her. i didn't look at her and as i was passing by her, she signals to me to come towards her so i went over to her. and she started to talk about how she felt compelled to talk to me and how nowadays when i look in the mirror i don't know who im looking at. and how my love relationships haven't been going well. and how i couldn't forget about this one guy and how i wasn't on good terms with my mom at the moment. she said all this other stuff but it tripped me out and it made me think. wow. the devil really is out there trying to tempt me and the rest of the world. and it made me believe and trust in God more knowing that He could protect me from all that. you guys don't understand how trippy that shit was. it really is. i wish all of you that are reading this, i hope that you will soon believe in Jesus soon cause it is He who will bring salvation. i sound like the Bible lol. and the funny thing is she stuttered when she mentioned God and i was about to go to Borders to buy a bible ... freaking crazy you guys. anyways, people pray!!!!!!!
may God bless you.
sledoot.
----
so today, (1/11/10) i was walking to Borders from work and as i was walking there, there was this lady sitting on these cafe tables outside. i didn't really pay attention to her but i felt some kind of staring from her. i didn't look at her and as i was passing by her, she signals to me to come towards her so i went over to her. and she started to talk about how she felt compelled to talk to me and how nowadays when i look in the mirror i don't know who im looking at. and how my love relationships haven't been going well. and how i couldn't forget about this one guy and how i wasn't on good terms with my mom at the moment. she said all this other stuff but it tripped me out and it made me think. wow. the devil really is out there trying to tempt me and the rest of the world. and it made me believe and trust in God more knowing that He could protect me from all that. you guys don't understand how trippy that shit was. it really is. i wish all of you that are reading this, i hope that you will soon believe in Jesus soon cause it is He who will bring salvation. i sound like the Bible lol. and the funny thing is she stuttered when she mentioned God and i was about to go to Borders to buy a bible ... freaking crazy you guys. anyways, people pray!!!!!!!
may God bless you.
sledoot.
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Monday, January 4, 2010
nisenjyu
damn, its 2010. it definately doesn't feel different. years are just ways to keep track of time, why do we have to start off fresh on jan 1st? why not any day? Eh, doesn't really matter. Times have been really rough and happy lately. For the past two weeks, I've been working full time and goodness thats tiring, but at least it's bringing money in. I get paid this Thursday too. yeeeuh.
i remembered something that naomi's mom said a while ago while she was helping kayla with her essay. it was about would it be better if you would rather follow society or be an individual. of course i said be an individual. and she was like how would you be an individual. i listed doing things my own way, blahblah, etc etc. but then she said, but arent you following what society wants you to do? going to school, getting a job. that hit me. it just hit me that we are all followers and not individuals. we are individuals but not like that. kinda strangeee.
lifes been full of stress lately. my report card came in and i had a C in apcalc. my mom called and was flippin a bitch but whatever. she doesnt understand how hard apcalc is. id wish she would take it and see how hard it is. but then again, i'm not trying. ACH TIMES ARE DEFINATELY HARD. times times times. TIMES. without time, we wouldnt be anything. time and God are very important. Time is money. God is everything. God is Love and Love is Real. i'm not making sense. i want someone to explain life's purpose to me. what's the big picture. what's in it for us. humans are stuck in a pandora box. im going to retreat this week, and i'm hoping i'll be able to find answers.
sledoot.
i remembered something that naomi's mom said a while ago while she was helping kayla with her essay. it was about would it be better if you would rather follow society or be an individual. of course i said be an individual. and she was like how would you be an individual. i listed doing things my own way, blahblah, etc etc. but then she said, but arent you following what society wants you to do? going to school, getting a job. that hit me. it just hit me that we are all followers and not individuals. we are individuals but not like that. kinda strangeee.
lifes been full of stress lately. my report card came in and i had a C in apcalc. my mom called and was flippin a bitch but whatever. she doesnt understand how hard apcalc is. id wish she would take it and see how hard it is. but then again, i'm not trying. ACH TIMES ARE DEFINATELY HARD. times times times. TIMES. without time, we wouldnt be anything. time and God are very important. Time is money. God is everything. God is Love and Love is Real. i'm not making sense. i want someone to explain life's purpose to me. what's the big picture. what's in it for us. humans are stuck in a pandora box. im going to retreat this week, and i'm hoping i'll be able to find answers.
sledoot.
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